What If Your Biggest Hater Is The Person You Are Fucking???

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What If Your Biggest Hater Is The Person You Are Fucking???

The most dangerous hater is the one that you don’t even know exists. How can you put your guard up to defend yourself against something you don’t even know is real?

Our spidey senses are trained to be on the lookout for fixed danger. Fixed danger is a threat that we have a frame of reference for, but what about the unconscious threat?

What if you’re lying next to a cancer, that’s poisoning you and you never even knew it? What if your biggest setback is your hating ass mate?

I’m all about personal accountability but sometimes the reason why we fall is because, the people who are supposed to be our support system are actually our biggest handicap, but it’s hard to shake them because our love for them blinds us from seeing certain things.

When we are in love with someone, we are under a spell, and while we’re under that spell nothing can break it except the person that cast it. Words are magic, and so is sex, so the moment we decide to love someone we volunteer ourselves to become foolish. The spell plays on our naivety, so we are totally oblivious to the shade being thrown our way.

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THINK ABOUT THIS

You’re probably such a cool person that you don’t notice your partner’s insecurities. Most likely you were a star all your life. People love you; it’s been this way since you were born.

All through elementary school you were a somebody, and your status increased more when you got to middle school and high school. You played on football teams, looked cute at the prom, was class president, leader of your cheer leading squad, and when you came around people, you were a blessing. You’ve been carrying a bright light with you your whole entire life.

Your mate noticed that light when the two of you met. They seen how bright you were shining, he/she was attracted to it like everyone else but once the intimacy started, their only goal was to dim that light.

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HOW CAN YOU TELL YOUR MATE IS YOUR BIGGEST HATER

 

6367dece553f17e300a3dbfc60bb813bIt’s real easy to tell if your mate hates on you, because they will block new people from coming into your life. True, everyone shouldn’t have access to us, but your mate blocks people from coming into your life that want to help you.

People bring seasons; your mate would like to keep you in the season that they can comprehend. If you elevate, then what about them?

 

You assume they have your best interest, because you have theirs, but that isn’t the case. They want you to themselves, and that’s toxic because your life’s purpose is to spread your wings. You evolving is a threat to them, because that would mean that they must evolve too.

Evolution disrupts comfort, people become content with comfort, but comfort is an enemy to those that have ambition.

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THE HATE HAS LEVELS

 

  • Dream Killers This type of hate is a devastating form of hate because, it comes off very innocent. It seems like harmless advice, but it’s advice that stagnates you. The words they say will never empower you, it’s always something fear based, to keep you stuck right there with them.

 

Example:

 

YOU: Hey babe, I was thinking that I should start my own business. I don’t want to work for anyone anymore; I have enough knowledge in my field that I’m positive that I can stand on my own. I talked to my friend at the bank, she said my credit is strong enough to get a lucrative loan, I really want to do this, you know how much I’ve wanted to be in business for myself, what do you think?

 

THEM: I don’t know bae, you’re not really good with money, and you might fuck up the loan, besides owning a business isn’t for everyone. Oh but guess what, my boss said if I pass this certification test, I’ll move up.

Do you know what that means? That means I’ll make more money, so you won’t have to worry about starting a business, something like that will just stress you out, and you know how overwhelmed you get. Let me pass this test and you can spend more time home, because I’ll make more money.

…………….

That’s called dream killing, not only did they kill your dream, but they insulted you as well. They highlighted things that are your weakness and made it the reason why it wasn’t a good idea. Also they made it about them. Them taking the test was more important than you starting your business, but why couldn’t he take the test and pass it, while you’re getting the business straight?

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  • THE SELF PITY HATER

This type of hate is very exhausting because it plays on your loyalty to care for people. It’s actually very abusive, it drains you constantly. This type of hate comes from emotionally damaged people. A couple of times a week, they will get into a funk about something that happened in their childhood.

When this happens you will turn into a super hero yet again, and give them the emotional ego stroke that they’re accustomed to.

But what about you though? If someone is draining you, where do you go, to fuel up?

Being with a self-pity person, will never allow you to get ahead because we need positive forms of energy. We have to compete in the world, how can we do that if we are drained?

It’s impossible to think clearly in a business meeting if you know your partner is about to drink themselves to death.

What you don’t know though, is that your partner is very conscious of their behavior. They have been with you for a long time; they know actually how you tick.

Their self-pity is strategic, it’s toxic, it’s abusive, and it’s a form of hate. They are sucking you dry, and your letting them.

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  • HAVING BABIES and GETTING MARRIED HATRED

 

On the surface it seems like having a bunch of babies and getting married is the thing to do. Well, it can be, but it’s not for everyone, and it’s based on timing.

A lot of times having children and being married kills your creative spark, so don’t let NO ONE push that on you if you’re not ready.

Don’t allow someone to give you the ultimatum, MARRY ME OR ELSE. Huh…BITCH BYE…NIGGA BYE

Your purpose for coming to the planet wasn’t to be someone’s husband or wife and push out millions of children. Your purpose is to reach your creative higher self, and if marriage and children come with that, then so be it.

Put your creativity first, because once the children come, you may have regrets. Of course you’ll love your children, but you’ll always be thinking what if. What if you took that job in Paris, what if you went to that audition, what if you put that book out etc.

That marriage and baby pressure is actually a form of hate. Don’t fall for it, commit to something like that when when you are ready.

 

  • TRADITION HATER

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What if you’re different than your family? What if you’re a free spirit and you want to go out into the world and find what works for you, instead of people telling you what you should do?

What if you want to go make mistakes? When you’re with a tradition hater they don’t like change. They can only exist within a box, but what if that box doesn’t work for you? What if you don’t want to be Christian anymore because it doesn’t work for you but your partner is condemning the new books you’re reading, even though the new information you’re getting is making you into a better person?

Our spiritual walks are very relative, they can be selfish, and they don’t typically involve other people. People feel threatened when we learn new things; for fear that we may start to see them in a different light.

If they leave, so what. They shouldn’t hold back your spiritual journey and you shouldn’t hold back theirs. Everyone has a right to flourish.

 

……..

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THE GAME

I think that our most important teachers are the people that we lay down with every night. We spend the most time with them, and they see us in different spaces that no one else does. They know our weaknesses, and they become dependent on our presence.

Their hate for you is rooted in their hunger to consume. They want to keep you away from anything that is new; a new season will highlight things about them that you may have had a blind spot to.

If you find new travel buddies, your mate will knock it, if you want to get in the gym your mate will knock it, if you get fixated on self-improvement, your mate will knock it, because all those changes come with different seasons.

Look at your relationship, is the person you’re with for you? Will they encourage you to follow your dreams, even if that means the relationship will change? Are they friends with you enough, to let you flourish even if that means, your growth doesn’t include them? Think about that, I’m sure you know the answer.

 

 

 

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Ken Brisbon
Ken Brisbon
I want to thank you for stopping by even if you don't agree with the things I say. I don't write for people to agree, I write to offer a different perspective, so If I got you to consider a thought you never considered before, then I've done my job.

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